Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Randomize
