you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Randomize
