Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Randomize
