I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize