one two three fourrrrnication!
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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