i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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