Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
