I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Randomize