he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
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