I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I am naked and annoyed.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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