I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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