the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
