South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
