She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
