I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
