I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
