i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Randomize
