She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
