yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
