you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
