that's an acceptable place to lick
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
