I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Someone shattered a urinal.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Randomize
