He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
party gras won. party gras always wins.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
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