"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
where am i from again
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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