I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
