Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
