i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
