I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
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