how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
