If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Randomize
