Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
As shirtless as possible
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
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