i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
