youre lurking in front of me
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
