its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize