Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I am available for nakedness
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Randomize
