Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
