you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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