News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
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