I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize