Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
