Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize