i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
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