ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
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Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Fuck appropriateness.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
