It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
