We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Randomize
