i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize