So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Randomize
