How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Randomize
