i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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