It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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