He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
