is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Randomize